It's the hard days that cause me to write. The hard days-when the laundry's piled high, the toys litter the floor, and my heart seems as though it's breaking in a million pieces. Yes, the housework reflects my heart. The days when a child's face can bring me to my knees. It's how I process, I suppose.
I used to think the face of a child in an orphanage might shatter my heart, but the other day... The other day I was reminded of children who have no one and they live on their own. Children the age of my oldest son-ten years old. They're not even in an orphanage with adults to care for them or food to sustain them. These are the days when I ask, "How Lord, how can we care for so many?" And He says, "One. One at a time." You do the work I set before you. One at a time."
Are the hard days so hard because I'm relying on myself. Have I forgotten who my Father is? Have I forgotten what Jesus has done for me?
I have begun to think that it is not too small a thing to focus all my energies and affections on the cross of Christ. When I look elsewhere, to the right or to the left, I feel discouraged. I must focus on the Cross because what I feel is not an accurate reflection of whose I am or who I am and most importantly who He is.
Dear God~In the name of Jesus, I ask for your grace and mercy, as I turn from myself and my feelings to You. I ask for forgiveness for relying on anything other than you. Amen